Disempowering Obstacles Hold You Back In Meditation (& Life). Here's How To Build Resilience, Connect To Your Power, Cultivate Deeper Meditative States, & Enjoy The Journey

What is your Road To Love?

In 2020, I began mapping the experiential journey in my meditations.

See, my destination—or intention—in meditation was love: to cultivate an experience of love within me that was beyond polarity, and far beyond the negative thought spiral of my monkey mind.

And I realized that there was a predictable Road To Love in meditation.

However, just like a standard highway, my Road includes many exits and off-ramps, such as my repetitive thoughts and worries, negative emotions, bodily aches, the leaf blower next door, remembering tasks that I forgot to do, and sensing the drool dripping off my chin — ad infinitum.

All of these off-ramps ruthlessly deter me from my destination. 

It’s very tempting to take the off-ramps.

Plus, it’s easier.

Similar to a car’s energetic fuel, it demands less of my energy to take a premature exit than to journey to my final destination.

In other words, it demands more energy to stay on the Road and avoid defaulting to my disempowering programs.

Now, if you want to access deeper states in your meditations and truly re-design who you are, you need to pre-identify the inevitable off-ramps that are going to distract you.

You want to be able to say, “Hey Distraction, I was expecting you.”

Do not let the off-ramps surprise you. Nor persuade you.

Additionally, you need to understand that the exits along the Road serve as indicators that you are getting closer to your destination. Contrary to what you may have assumed, the exits can be perceived as a positive sign.

But you need to stay on the Road. Keep going. Don’t give up on yourself.

At Dr. Joe Dispenza’s Advanced Meditation Retreat in April 2021, he mapped out the off-ramps that keep people stuck in being their “familiar self” — the habitual default self who holds you back from everything you most deeply desire in life.

In Dr. Joe's teachings, there are many obstacles that prevent you from accessing the quantum field (i.e., God, Source, Mystery - whatever you want to call it). These are akin to the exits on Dr. Joe's Road To Love:

• Senses: sight, sound, touch, taste, and smell

• Internal bodily feelings: aches, pains, hunger, discomfort, etc.

• Identity: self-referential thoughts and ego

• Memories: good and bad, alike

• Emotions: especially disempowering emotions

• Beliefs: this determines what you think is possible in meditation (and life), which influences your intention and the energy you put behind it

• Choices: Here are some examples: take the off-ramp, or hold your intention? Itch your arm, or let it pass? Think about your ex-girlfriend, or focus on your anchor? Etc.

• Voices: your inner voice and the voice of others inside your head, such as your parents, boss, or close relationships

• Parasites: disincarnate entities that drain your energy (I know, it might seem strange. But the universe is a mysterious place.)

• Time: activating the neurological network that worries about time, e.g. “How much time is left in this meditation? I can’t do this for another 15 minutes. This meditation needs to end quickly, so I can go become my familiar self again.”

Now, it’s not good enough to simply recognize this comprehensive list of off-ramps.

You also need to have a pre-designed process to keep yourself on the Road.

My process is generally as follows:

• Start accessing a deep meditative state

• Get distracted by the off-ramps

• Deploy the discipline to overcome the temptation to exit

• Release physical tension in my eyeballs, face, and hands

• Focus on my anchor (rhythmic heart-focused breathing and feeling a big black space behind my eyeballs)

• Embody the indomitable, timeless aspect of myself (a.k.a. my soul who doesn’t give a fuck about any off-ramp)

At the core, what we are talking about here is anticipation. 

What does your Road To Love look like? Maybe you are headed to inner peace, God, or simply flow in your workout. 

What can you expect that will fight to take you away from being fully present on your journey?

What can you anticipate that will repeatedly deter you from being the person you've always wanted to be?

And what’s your process to overcome the temptation to take an early exit and give up on yourself?

Mapping this out will help you maintain your connection to your power.

And it will start to groove the new neural roadways that will carry you where you really want to go in life.

If you do not become aware of your Road To Love AND have a process for sticking to it, you will habitually default to your old self.

And that only guarantees that you'll repeat the same patterns that have you held captive to a life that you don't love.

As you might see, the sneaky lesson here is not about arriving at some destination. It's about who you are along the way.

As the legendary shaman Don Howard taught me in the Amazonian jungles of Peru, the journey is the destination.

Know your Road To Love.

And enjoy the ride.

Love, Connor

P.S. What resonated with you? What do you want to hear more of? Send me a note!

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